Intimacy, fear and yoga

When we research the meaning of the word yoga, we find out that it means union. 

The word "yoga" comes from the Sanskrit root yuj,  which means "to join" or "to yoke".

Everyone can have their own interpretation of what this union means, but I will share a thought that I leaned in a workshop I attended in January. I was at a workshop with a famous yoga and meditation teacher. After practice, we all sat down to listen to his wisdom and the one things from his talk that stayed with me was when he said that human beings are deeply afraid of intimacy. And the idea here is not related to intimate relationships between a romantic couple. What he meant is that we are deeply afraid to connect with ourselves, we fear intimacy and what it would mean to deeply know what goes on in our hearts and our souls. Maybe because we are afraid of what we will find and the fact that it might not be the same truth of our build up expectations. Maybe it's because we are afraid that we'll realize how amazingly strong and powerful we are and we are just not ready to do what it takes to let our lights shine brighter and to realize our mission in this lifetime, (taking the red pill or the blue pill, face reality, whatever you call it).

For our teacher, mindfulness is what brings humans closer to themselves. We need to be able to initiate intimacy with ourselves. Yoga and meditation are just paths that will bring you closer to your inner being and they will allow you to initiate a connection with your most intimate truth. Intimacy, what he also called mindfulness, is the connection to what happens in our moment to moment. We're so afraid of intimacy with ourselves that we don't let go of the past, what has been, or we get anxious about what is to come, because most of us cannot bear the idea of simply being here now. To be here now, means simply be fully present in the moment or situation you're experiencing. To allow you thoughts and feelings to come, but also allow them to go. Intimacy is context specific and it can be present in whatever you are doing, whether you're washing the dishes or going for a walk. In this sense, meditation can be anything that allows you focus on being present with whatever you're doing at this moment. 

When we recognize our true nature, we realize that (quoting another teacher): "we're the awareness between our breaths (or thoughts, can't remember now)" which means that nothing that we believe to be real, actually is. We have constructed an idea of what we are and who we think we are but when we start to take these ideas apart, we realize that nothing we thought about ourselves is real and that is when non-attachment comes along. We need to cultivate intimacy without being attached to it. Accepting what is, surrendering to what will be. Let thoughts, feeilings and ideas come, and let them go. Love, in other words, is nothing more than intimacy without grasping. It is being present in the moment and accepting whatever is happening, not trying to control the situation with pre-conceived ideas of what it should be like, or what it should feel like. 

May we have a chance to go deep and to fully experience intimacy with ourselves and with our friends and romantic relationships. It would be a waste to live a life only half lived. May we live fully present in the moment, so present that we just are. Just be. Be here now. 

Namasté  ॐ